February 22, 2012

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Encourage Your Partner to Spend More Time with You.

October 8, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Do you constantly feel that your man is only spending time with you because you make him. Does it seem that he would rather spend time with anyone but you? If the answer is yes, then it is time that you did something positive to change the situation. Here are some ideas for you to think about:

Try to be happy with who you are. If you are constantly dissatisfied with who you are and what you have, then it is no wonder that he would rather go out with his friends or stay at work. Be happy and positive about yourself and you will be a more attractive and confident person to be around.

Make sure that you have your own life: It is not healthy for two people to spend all their time together to the exclusion of all others, no matter how much in love they may be. It is vital that you have some independent activities and interests. If he feels that you are just sitting around


miserably waiting for him to take you out, then that is not a very attractive thought to come home to. Having your own interests will give you something to talk about and bring to the relationship and will help keep things interesting and fresh. 

Encourage his other interests: Let him see that you are happy for him to have other interests. Show an interest in what he is doing and encourage him to talk about his hobby or sport. If he feels that he has your blessing for what he enjoys doing in his spare time, then he is more likely not to feel so pressurised into spending time with you.

Let the time together be about both of you. When you do go out or spend time with each other don’t just do things that you want to do. Take turns in chosing where to go or what movie you want to watch if you stay in. Let him talk about himself, don’t just make the conversation about you.

Dont spend your time together criticising him. If, when you do spend time with him you do nothing but criticise him, then he will avoid putting himself in that situation and will find even more excuses for not being with you, nobody wants to be criticised constantly. Make him feel good about himself and be positive about how you are both going to find a solution to your relationship problems.   

Finally let him know why you want to spend time with him. Remind him of how much you care for him and why you chose to spend your life with him in the first place. 

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Advice for Women, Reconnecting, Relationships Tagged With: ,

Bring back some intimate moments in your relationship.

September 18, 2011 By Leave a Comment

It is not unusual when you have been in a relationship for a while although you still have deep feelings for your partner to find you are not attracted to them anymore. Some people are perfectly happy with this and see it as a natural development. They are happy loving their partner as a life long companion and soul mate, problems may only arise when both partners do not feel the same and one sees a lack of intimacy as a sign that the relationship has gone stale. Even if you are happy with the way things are in your relationship, there is nothing wrong with trying to spice things up a bit and bring some more excitement back into your relationship. Something as simple as getting dressed up and recreating one of those early dates could be enough to get the pair of you also recreating that early fun.

Remember what attracted you to each other to start with.

Think back to the time when you were attracted to your partner, what was it that turned you on? Was it their smile, their looks or their sense of humour? You couldn’t wait to see them and be intimate with them. Has your partner stopped trying to look attractive, if so try to gently coax them into trying harder. Be positive, criticism will only make things worse. If your male partner used to wear well cut suits and now doesn’t want to get out of his sweat pants, suggest that you would love to see him in a suit again as he looks so handsome in one.

Be subtle about what turns you off, but it should be discussed

Always highlight what you do like about them and put any criticisms forward in a positive way. This I agree is not easy, but if you think that he could do with showering more you do need to discuss it, in a frank and positive manner.

Accepting negative feedback gracefully


Be prepared for the fact that just as your partner is not turning you on anymore, you may not be coming across as attractive to them either. So, while you are giving suggestions to your partner, encourage them to do the same as well. What you need to do is work together to bring the fun back into your relationship.

Excitement in the bedroom

One thing that will do wonders for the relationship is if you can spice things up in the bedroom. Create the right mood for an intimate evening and dedicate all that time to your partner. Make sure you both dress well and look good and you may just find yourself wondering why you ever thought there was a problem.

Improving health and fitness

One major reason why levels of physical intimacy wanes for a lot of couples is neglect to their health and fitness. You may both have put on weight and your energy levels are down and the kids and work are stressing you out. You need to try to fit some exercise into your routine. If you can do it together, so much the better. You both will start looking and feeling better, your hormonal balance and overall mood will improve and your energy levels will go up, all of which are known to impact favourably on your sex drive .

If you want to there is no reason why you cannot share a lifelong intimate relationship while still enjoying the comfort of having your partner as your best friend.

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Reconnecting, Relationships Tagged With:

Review of The Magic of Making Up, by T.W. Jackson.

August 13, 2011 By Leave a Comment

There are a great number of books and articles about getting back with an ex on the market, most contain  limited or inaccurate information, but The Magic of Making Up is one of the most complete and thorough publications on the subject that we have encountered.

Author T. W. Jackson covers all the important points, from understanding why your relationship ended, to maintaining the fun and love after you get back together. With clear explanations on how to ease back into the relationship, without making the same old mistakes.

So what do you get when you order ‘The Magic of Making Up’?

When you download ‘The Magic of Making Up’, you will actually receive three separate books:

  1. The Magic of Making Up takes you through the process of…
    • understanding what went wrong,
    • healing your current pain so you can think straight,
    • evaluating your current situation and making your plan, and then
    • executing your plan.
  2. The Clean Slate Method reveals the formula for apologizing in a way that will wipe the slate clean, so your relationship can begin to heal.
  3. Mind Magic exposes secret psychological tactics to use in the relationship.

 

Who is  ‘The Magic of Making Up’ Intended for?

The Magic of Making Up is suitable for men and women. It is appropriate for any level of relationship commitment, whether you were married to your ex, or just dating.

It should be noted that the book focuses on the relationship between adults and does not spend much time on the complexities that arise when children are involved.

The techniques in the book apply no matter how long your relationship lasted, weeks or years. Although the use of him and her assume a heterosexual couple has broken up, the advice applies equally well to gay men and women.

What makes T. W. Jackson such an expert?

Any review of  The Magic of Making Up would not be complete without talking about the author.

Jackson calls himself  ’the male version of Dear Abby’.  He travelled a lot growing up and says that constantly having to make new friends is how he learned to get along with people.

As an adult he is now ‘really good at reading people’, so much so that his troubled friends frequently come to him for advice on their relationships.

After years of applying his real-world experience to other people’s problems, Jackson decided to document his techniques and make them available to all. He admits he’s not a doctor or professional counsellor, but stands by his claim to have expertise gained after years of knowing hundreds of people, and paying attention to them.

Does it work?

The key sections have to do with communication, for example, when and how to apologize. How to keep a conversation from turning into an argument. How to take back words that led to your breakup and start over again. Plus, what to say to get your ex talking to you again in the first place.

In addition when you download The Magic of Making Up, you will receive ‘Mind Magic’ too, which is all about relationship psychology. Jackson’s system is also about maximizing your chances of getting back together!   

Magic of Making Up review:

There are a lot of strong testimonials from people for whom this system has worked and with a 60-day money back guarantee, you have nothing to risk. Remember your ex need never know the secret methods you used to win a second chance. The Magic of Making Up system is an easy read, flows logically, offers well thought out suggestions and is full of quality ideas, for managing your emotions and getting back with your ex.

Go to T.W Jacksons’s site, watch his video, read his story and see for yourself we are sure you will not regret it.

 

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Filed Under: Affairs, Reconciliation, Reconnecting, Relationships Tagged With: ,

Tips To Help You Get Your Girlfriend Back

August 7, 2011 By Leave a Comment

When I was younger, I also didn’t know how to get my girlfriend back after we broke up. But experience taught me a lot of things about women that helped me attract not only my ex girlfriends, but other women as well.

But let me tell you that unless you’re natural chick-magnet, you should have the discipline to stand on your ground and not compromise your goals. The more you practice these tips, the easier it is for you to implement them over time. So with that in mind, let me share a few tips on how to rekindle the romance with a girl who broke up with you.

Stay Away From Her

Staying away from a girl you still love is a difficult feat. This is why you need to conjure all the discipline that you could muster for you to do this. Just think about the long-term benefits this could bring you.

Besides, talking to her while both of you still want to rip each other’s heads off is not a good idea. Staying away from her gives her time to miss you and want you more. If you noticed, girls go crazy over players who do not show up after a wild lay. This is because women gravitate towards men they can’t have.

Come and Go

When I was wondering how to get my girlfriend back, I realized a lot of things. The less time I spend with her, the more she tries to get a hold of me.

The best way to attract an ex girlfriend back to your life is by acting like a prize instead of the pursuer. You can contact her and ask how she is but never let the conversation linger. Ask her out, but keep the date shorter than usual. Avoid replying to her messages instantly. Smothering her with too much attention will make her lose her interest in you. And you think this only happens in men, huh? Women, too, love the chase.

Do Not Show Your Weakness

If you think you can get her back by telling her how your life is a mess without her, think again. Women hate it when men become overly sentimental about things. Yes, it may make them feel good but in the long run, it just becomes unattractive over time. Women are generally attracted to men who are dominant, strong and exhibit some bad boy qualities. They don’t want to be with a man who sheds more tears and writes more love letters than them. Avoid being too sentimental and just act cool and keep things casual and fun.

Know When to Say NO

I realized that just because we broke up and I really want to know how to get my girlfriend back, it doesn’t mean I should give in to all her qualms. Yes, you want her back but don’t make it too obvious. Otherwise, women will take advantage of this and convert you into a loyal puppy that follows her around.

Women value men who have a mind of their own. Saying yes to her all the time empowers them to take you for granted, and drop you like a hot potato once they find someone better. The process of attracting an ex girlfriend back into your life is never easy, but it begins with being disciplined and not acting needy, clingy or desperate.

By Dean Cortez

Filed Under: Dating, Dating Tips for Women, Reconnecting, Relationships Tagged With:

How to Get Your Ex-Boyfriend to Want You Back

August 7, 2011 By Leave a Comment

A break up can be really painful, especially if you are still much in love with your ex. However, if you want your ex-boyfriend back, you don’t have to chase after him and beg him to come back. The key to winning him back is to not be desperate. Instead, use smart and clever ways to win his heart back and these are the things that you should do:

1. Learn the post-breakup don’ts

Before you do what you need to do, here are some unnecessary things you supposed to avoid doing in order to patch things up with your ex-boyfriend:

- Sending tons of emails, texts, or love letters to your ex

- Showing up anywhere he usually hangs out

- Apologizing for all the bad times

- Calling your ex all the time

- Arguing about your relationship

- Convincing him to want you back

2. Make up your mind

Take some time alone after the breakup and decide whether you really want him back or not. Anxiety is often mistaken for love. Therefore you need to calm yourself down before you make any decision.

3. Give him some space

By doing this, your ex will know what it is like to be without you, and hopefully he’ll miss you. Show that you don’t chase after him after all. He will get back to you in no time if he really still loves you.

4. Improve yourself and your life quality

Involving in social activities, exercising, focusing on your studies, as well as reconnecting with your family and friends will give you positive attitude toward your life in general. When your ex finally meets you again, he will notice that your emotional, mental, intellectual, and even physical qualities have improved.

5. Improve your appearance

This is an effective way to draw your ex-boyfriend’s attention. After your breakup, you should change your appearance, but don’t overdo it. Here are several things you can do to make your ex-boyfriend to take a second glance at you:

- Exercise regularly. You don’t need to be super thin to be attractive. A fit, toned body is more appealing.

- Keep a good posture. Walk with confidence as though you are feeling great and secure.

- Create a different look with make-up.

- Wear clothes that suit his style.

- Get a new haircut that compliments your face. A highlight job can work as well.

The above materials are the tips on how to get an ex-boyfriend back. If you are a boy and desperately needs guidance on how to win girl back, visit our site to read some of our pull your ex back review.

By Jp Chen Sun Jo

Filed Under: Reconnecting, Relationships Tagged With:

Christian Relationship Help: Is Perfectionism Hurting Your Relationships?

August 7, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Is perfectionism hurting your relationships? If you know you struggle with perfectionism with yourself, there is a good chance that this character trait is also hurting the people around you. Perfectionism manifests itself in relationships in the following five ways:

Discontentment with the relationship. Perfectionists aren’t contented people. They have high expectations for the relationship and are vocal about them. Regardless of how well things are going, they aren’t truly satisfied, because after all, it could be better. This discontentment feels personal to the other person, because it will feel like a personal failure, even though the source of the discontentment is really the perfectionist’s unreachable standards

Hypercriticism of other people. People who are perfectionists are hypercritical, because they expect things to be perfect. “Perfect” is relative and the mark tends to be moved, so no matter how much people do, it never really is quite enough. It is said that a critical person is even more critical of themselves, but that is little solace when someone is being critiqued and always falling short. It is exasperating and disheartening to never be good enough for someone whose opinion you value.

Shaming others’ mistakes. Shaming communicates the message that the person who made the mistake is a mistake. It makes the person feel bad about themselves rather than just bad about what they did. Criticism that attacks the person with labels, name-calling, negative assumptions, and over-reaching conclusions about one’s character feel shaming. Perfectionists shame because they believe that in order to be good enough, people need to be perfect.

A push for others to achieve. It isn’t surprising that high achievers are often perfectionists. They push themselves and others hard. Self-worth is linked to achievement and the self-worth of the perfectionist is also often linked to how well his/her spouse, children, family, and employees do.

Conditional love and acceptance. Unconditional love and acceptance convey the message that regardless of what someone does or doesn’t do that he/she will be loved and accepted. Conditional love means that love is given when and only when certain conditions are met. Perfectionists offer conditional love and acceptance, because they give these things when they are satisfied with the other person, and since they are rarely satisfied, everything feels conditional.

Perfectionism isn’t good for relationships. It prevents the other person from feeling approved, loved, and accepted. It lowers the self-worth of others and makes other people afraid to be themselves.

If your high standards are hurting any of your relationships, take note of how Jesus treated people. Even though He truly was perfect, He offered grace, acceptance, forgiveness, and unconditional love to those that weren’t. He conveyed the message that each person had great value even though the person’s actions fell short. When the people in your life aren’t perfect, treat them like Jesus would.

By Karla Downing  

If you need more practical tips and Biblical truths to help you change your relationships, get my FREE “15-Day Relationship Challenge” designed to give you back the power over your life.  http://www.free15daychallenge.com

Karla Downing is an author, speaker, licensed marriage and family therapist, and Bible study teacher. Karla’s passion is to help people find freedom in Christ in the midst of their difficult relationships and circumstances through Biblical truths and practical tools.

Filed Under: Problems, Reconnecting, Relationships Tagged With:

Improving Marriages Through the Utilization of Marriage Counselling

August 7, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Most couples are incredibly happy when they make the decision to pursue marriage as a long term opportunity to fortify their relationship. Marriage represents a very joyous occasion where friends and family come together to celebrate the legal coupling of two individuals. Whether a couple has been together for a few months or a few years, the pursuit of marriage can often create changes within a relationship and it is important that a couple addressees these changes, in order to avoid complications. One high quality resource to utilize when pursuing the best environment to address any relationship changes is found with the resources of marriage counselling.

Whether a couple was recently married or has been married for years, most relationships significantly change when a couple gets married. The excitement related to being a couple can often fade over time, as individuals focus on more pressing concerns, such as family or career demands. This reduction in relationship focus can create a wide variety of different problems that, if not resolved, can cause significant damage to the relationship. Utilization of marriage counselling helps to create a unique forum, where couples can come together and take time to focus on their relationship, outside of exterior demands.

There are many benefits that a couple will be able take advantage of, when utilizing the resources of marriage counselling to strengthen their relationship. It is the responsibility of every individual in a relationship, to take the time that is necessary to focus on each other, regardless of the demands that are placed upon an individual as a result of family or work. When relationships go ignored in favor of exterior influences, it can lead to complications that may result in the potential for divorce. When looking into the unique benefits that are created through counselling, you will be able take advantage of resources, such as improving communication, as well as discovering resolutions to problems.

Over time, relationship communication often becomes limited to casual greetings and the occasional interest in a person’s day. The open communication once shared in the relationship becomes limited, as individuals focus on other factors impacting their life. Through the utilization marriage counselling, you will be able to benefit from an open form of communication, where you move beyond the casual conversation of greetings and take advantage of real opportunities to communicate with one another. This improving communication through the utilization of counselling can then be carried over to your everyday life, so that your relationship is further strengthened.

In addition to improving communication, another opportunity of marriage counselling, is to find solutions to any problems that may exist. Greater communication will help to address specific issues an individual may have with the relationship, so that concerns can be addressed and the relationship can be improved.

By Morgan Hayward

To discover one of the best resources for you take advantage of when it comes to the utilization of high quality marriage counselling, visit http://www.SydneyCounselling.com.

Are you finding problems with relationships? Do you also need an anger management session? Seek the help of a professional for relationship counselling, anger management sessions, low self esteem problems and even help with sexual health. Visit http://www.sydneycounselling.com to know how Morgan Hayward can help you out with your furtive and intricate problems.

Filed Under: Reconnecting, Relationships Tagged With:

Why Does Forgiveness Often Lag?

August 7, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Even though God knows we may never fully achieve healing this side of eternity, we’re still asked to try… in this case, to forgive. And, this because of a promise: we wake one morning, and suddenly realise, HEALED ARE WE!

Who did it, but God?

The issue either no longer matters or the pain’s removed altogether. Only God can do this. No other rationale contends with the miraculous.

EXISTING IN THE IN-BETWEEN

Caught between the past and the future, the present holds us – somewhat hurt; acutely at times… chronically at others… residually, the hurt thought recurs.

The in-between is our problem – the time after the hurt but before healing satisfactorily amends the situation.

Forgiveness lags because we’ve been thrown into a reprehensible situation. We learned that life can be horrible; that our relationships can be ripped apart or ripped from us or that we’re easily betrayed; that life and outcomes often change or end unpredictably, unsatisfactorily; with stinging finality.

Forgiveness lags for so many reasons we might be aware of; and for so many reasons we cannot yet (or at times, ever) be aware of.

The ‘why’ may not actually be the issue.

Regardless of all things – including the blessings of forgiveness for those so gifted – we need to bear in mind that it’s okay for the real experience of forgiveness, of healing, to lag.


This also helps us understand why others might find it hard to forgive us; beyond their own best-of-efforts. Why do we judge them for a lack of intimacy when we too have contributed barriers?

A broader perspective prevails…

We can only appreciate the in-between time as a stage of life where God’s teaching us things we don’t yet know, but ought to. The discomfort is for our own good.

GOD’S MANDATE – KEEP TRYING

God simply requires we keep trying. The effort apportioned in grace will be blessed, eventually. Resilience is its own reward; the by-product, the strength of hopeful joy.

The more we practice forgiveness, the more we learn, the more mature we become.

Hurts can be thought of as feedstock for learning; learning is, in turn, feedstock for growth in maturity – the overall goal of the spiritual person desiring completion.

The complete person is open. They will accept the malleability of the God-designed life. They’ve learned to grasp challenges and trials without thought of recompense. Perhaps they see life through others’ lives, and through God’s sight too.

Their openness to all God has for them will see them blessed, eventually

© 2011 S. J. Wickham.

Steve Wickham is a Registered Safety Practitioner (BSc, FSIA, RSP[Australia]) and a qualified, unordained Christian minister (GradDipBib&Min). His blogs are at: http://epitemnein-epitomic.blogspot.com/ and http://inspiringbetterlife.blogspot.com/

Filed Under: Reconnecting, Relationships Tagged With: